read more on …

What is a Trauma?Ibiza

Trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event like an accident, rape or natural disaster. Immediately after the event, shock and denial are typical. Longer term reactions include unpredictable emotions, flashbacks, strained relationships and even physical symptoms like headaches or nausea. While these feelings are normal, some people have difficulty moving on with their lives. Psychologists can help these individuals find constructive ways of managing their emotions.

After Traumatic Events

* Talking to your children about the recent spate of school shootings

Every child will respond to trauma differently. Some will have no ill effects; others may suffer an immediate and acute effect. Still others may not show signs of stress until sometime after the event.
* Recovering emotionally from disaster

Understanding the emotions and normal responses that follow a disaster or other traumatic event can help you cope with your feelings, thoughts and behaviors – and can help you on the path to recovery.
* Open Up! Writing About Trauma Reduces Stress, Aids Immunity

Writing about difficult, even traumatic, experiences appears to be good for health on several levels – raising immunity and other health measures and improving life functioning.
* Helping your children manage distress in the aftermath of a shooting

As a parent, you may be struggling with how to talk with your children about a shooting.
* Questions and Answers about Memories of Childhood Abuse

Tips to help you better understand how repressed, recovered or suggested memories may occur and what you can do if you or a family member is concerned about a childhood memory.

Read More: Trauma – EMDR

What Is Anxiety – Panic Disorders – Social Phobia?Ibiza

Anxiety, worry, and stress are all a part of most people’s life today. But simply experiencing anxiety or stress in and of itself does not mean you need to get professional help or you have an anxiety disorder. In fact, anxiety is a necessary warning signal of a dangerous or difficult situation. Without anxiety, we would have no way of anticipating difficulties ahead and preparing for them.

Anxiety becomes a disorder when the symptoms become chronic and interfere with our daily lives and our ability to function. People suffering from chronic anxiety often report the following symptoms:

• Muscle tension

• Physical weakness

• Poor memory

• Sweaty hands

• Fear or confusion

• Inability to relax

• Constant worry

• Shortness of breath

• Palpitations

• Upset Stomach

• Poor concentration

These symptoms are severe and upsetting enough to make individuals feel extremely uncomfortable, out of control and helpless.

Anxiety disorders fall into a set of separate diagnoses, depending upon the symptoms and severity of the anxiety the person experiences.

Read More:  Anxiety – Panic Disorders – Social Phobia

What Is Bullying? Ibiza

At first glance, it might appear that this behavior is easy to define. A common image of bullying might be of a physically intimidating boy beating up a smaller classmate or of one child shoving another inside a hallway locker. While that is still considered bullying, it’s important to know that bullying behaviors can be much more complex and varied than historical stereotypes.

For example, while some bullying is physical and easy to recognize, bullying can also occur quietly and covertly, through gossip or on a smart phone or the internet, causing emotional damage. As a starting point, there are elements that are included in most definitions of bullying. Although definitions vary from source to source, most agree that an act is defined as bullying when:

• The behavior hurts, humiliates, or harms another person physically or emotionally.

• Those targeted by the behavior have difficulty stopping the action directed at them, and struggle to defend themselves.

• There is also a real or perceived “imbalance of power,” which is described as when the student with the bullying behavior has more “power,” either physically, socially, or emotionally, such as a higher social status, or is physically larger or emotionally intimidating.

Many definitions also include:

• The types of Bullying: The behavior can be overt and direct, with physical behaviors, such as fighting, hitting or name calling, or it can be covert, with emotional-social interactions, such as gossiping or leaving someone out on purpose. Bullying can also happen in-person, online or through smart phones and texts.

• Intent of the part of the student with bullying behavior: “It is intentional, meaning the act is done willfully, knowingly, and with deliberation to hurt or harm,” but there is some controversy with this statement as some assert that not all bullying behavior is done with intent or that the individual bullying realizes that their behavior is hurting another individual.

• Distinction about amount and duration: Many definitions indicate that the bullying is “repeated,” but the reality is that bullying can be circumstantial or chronic. It might be the result of a single situation, such as being the new student at school, or it might be behavior that has been directed at the individual for a long period of time.

• The implications for all students: It is also important to note that bullying is not just about the implications for those targeted by the behaviors, but that the behavior can impact all students in the school, including those who witness the behavior and those that engage in the behavior.

• Additional factors: these can include; the differentiation between bullying and harassment, enumeration of protected classes, statements around the use of technology, how the behavior impacts educational performance and the physical locations that would fall under the jurisdiction of school sanctions.

Students often describe bullying as when “someone makes you feel less about who you are as a person.”

Read More

Why Couples Therapy? Ibiza

Couples therapy can help couples improve their relationship in many ways. For instance, it helps couples resolve conflict, learn how to communicate effectively, better understand each other, enhance their emotional connection and strengthen their bond.

Naturally, couples may face obstacles in therapy that stall their progress. They may have inaccurate assumptions about how therapy works, which can keep them stuck. Or they may delay seeing a therapist in the first place, which only deepens their problems. We asked two relationship experts to share the most common obstacles along with what couples can do to overcome them. Below you’ll find six obstacles and solutions.

1. Wanting the other partner to change. “When clients come in for couple therapy they want a change,” said Mudita Rastogi, Ph.D, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Arlington Heights, Ill. “However, sometimes what they really want is for the therapy to change their partner’s behavior.” For instance, they might want the therapist to change their partner’s spending habits. But they’d like to stay the same. However, in couples therapy, “the target of change is the relationship,” Rastogi said. Both partners need to make changes in order to improve the relationship. Both need to change their perceptions and behaviors. “For example, couples who want to change their fights over money will each need to examine their own patterns around money, and the role it plays in their relationship.”

2. Not acknowledging your role. Another common — and related — obstacle is not taking responsibility for your role in your relationship problems. “Couples therapy can often feel like a courtroom for the therapist,” said Meredith Hansen, Psy.D, a clinical psychologist who specializes in couples, premarital and newlywed counseling. That’s because both partners are trying to communicate their side and hoping to receive validation and feedback from each other, she said. They might focus on what their partner did wrong by saying, “You did this” or “I did this because you did this,” Hansen said. However, in order for couples therapy to be effective, both partners must acknowledge how they’re contributing to the argument or problem, and work on changing their behavior, she said. She shared this example: “I’m sorry, I know I did not approach my complaint in the best way. I will try to phrase things differently in the future.”

3. Keeping secrets. Some partners start couples therapy with secrets — such as an affair or addiction — and they intend to keep those secrets, Rastogi said. However, “clients who continue to keep secrets from their spouse while engaging in couple therapy are fooling themselves and their loved ones, and creating barriers to achieve real change.” If you’re keeping a secret from your spouse, consider its implications for your relationship, she said. “Secrets can sap trust and life out of marriages. They can morph into thick walls against interpersonal intimacy.” (While you don’t have to share all your secrets, it’s best to reveal and work through any secrets that are currently affecting your relationship, Rastogi said.) “Your therapist can assist you with this process, and your relationship will likely be stronger and have greater integrity due to this.” Rastogi also noted that every clinician has a different way of handling secrets. She explains to couples before they start therapy that she won’t keep secrets. As such, if a partner reveals they’re having an affair, they either need to share it with their partner or they can’t continue therapy. “I believe this helps me best serve the needs of both members of the couple while doing effective work.”

4. Not following through. Couples may agree on what needs to change in a relationship in order for it to improve, Hansen said. But following through or applying helpful techniques during an argument can be difficult, she said. “To overcome this obstacle, couples must learn to be patient with one another and work together as a team.” Hansen encourages her clients to identify “catchphrases” for times that an argument is getting out of control, such as: “we’re off track”; “we’re spiraling”; “we need to stop”; “break” or “pause”; or “something playful [or] anything to interrupt the fight.” She also suggests learning to identify and then expressing when you’re becoming emotionally overwhelmed. One clue is when you “feel like you are too overwhelmed to listen or engage in a productive manner.” And she encourages clients to take a 20-minute break to relax and refocus. “Both parties must use the time to calm themselves, and both must agree to return to the discussion after 20 minutes.”

5. Not trusting the process. Couples might enter therapy wanting a quick fix or again wanting the clinician to tell their partner that they need to change, Hansen said. However, to improve your relationship, it’s important for couples to trust the therapy process, she said. “…[T]o really get to the root of your marital conflict and begin the healing process, you and your spouse will have to invest your time and commit to learning how to be vulnerable with one another, expressing feelings rather than thoughts, acknowledging your role in the dance, and learning how to hear what you partner is truly saying.”

6. Waiting too long. “Many couples use couple therapy as their last stop before heading off to their divorce attorney or court,” Rastogi said. However, these couples are less likely to improve their relationship, she said. If a conflict is negatively affecting your marriage, and doesn’t go away, seek help early. Avoid waiting and hoping that it’ll pass. “It won’t.” If you are going to therapy as a last resort, Rastogi stressed the importance of keeping an open mind. “Late help-seeking couples” also can use therapy to “weigh their choices, resolve some conflicts or even plan a structured separation that keeps their relationship civil and functional.” Ultimately, see a couples therapist as soon as possible. “If you and your partner are struggling, reach out for help while you are both willing to make changes and are invested in the relationship,” Hansen said.

Read More

What Is Depression? Ibiza

Most people have felt sad or depressed at times. Feeling depressed can be a normal reaction to loss, life’s struggles, or an injured self-esteem.

But when feelings of intense sadness — including feeling helpless, hopeless, and worthless — last for many days to weeks and keep you from functioning normally, your depression may be something more than sadness. It may very well be clinical depression — a treatable medical condition.
How Do I Know If I Have Depression? I

According to the DSM-5, a manual used to diagnose mental disorders, depression occurs when you have at least five of the following symptoms at the same time:

• A depressed mood during most of the day, particularly in the morning
• Fatigue or loss of energy almost every day
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt almost every day
• Impaired concentration, indecisiveness
• Insomnia (an inability to sleep) or hypersomnia (excessive sleeping) almost every day
• Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in almost all activities nearly every day
• Recurring thoughts of death or suicide (not just fearing death)
• A sense of restlessness or being slowed down
• Significant weight loss or weight gain

A key sign of depression is either depressed mood or loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed. For a diagnosis of depression, these signs should be present most of the day either daily or nearly daily for at least two weeks. In addition, the depressive symptoms need to cause clinically significant distress or impairment. They cannot be due to the direct effects of a substance, for example, a drug or medication. Nor can they be the result of a medical condition such as hypothyroidism.
Symptoms Of Depression? I

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, people with depressive illnesses don’t all experience the same symptoms. How severe they are, how frequent, and how long they last will vary depending on the individual and his or her particular illness. Here are common symptoms people with depression experience:

• Difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions
• Fatigue and decreased energy
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and/or helplessness
• Feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
• Insomnia, early morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
• Irritability, restlessness
• Loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex
• Loss of pleasure in life
• Overeating or appetite loss
• Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment
• Persistent sad, anxious, or „empty“ feelings
• Thoughts of suicide or suicide attempts

Read more

What Is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)?

Everyone double checks things sometimes. For example, you might double check to make sure the stove or iron is turned off before leaving the house. But people with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) feel the need to check things repeatedly, or have certain thoughts or perform routines and rituals over and over. The thoughts and rituals associated with OCD cause distress and get in the way of daily life.

The frequent upsetting thoughts are called obsessions. To try to control them, a person will feel an overwhelming urge to repeat certain rituals or behaviors called compulsions. People with OCD can’t control these obsessions and compulsions. Most of the time, the rituals end up controlling them.

For example, if people are obsessed with germs or dirt, they may develop a compulsion to wash their hands over and over again. If they develop an obsession with intruders, they may lock and relock their doors many times before going to bed. Being afraid of social embarrassment may prompt people with OCD to comb their hair compulsively in front of a mirror-sometimes they get “caught” in the mirror and can’t move away from it. Performing such rituals is not pleasurable. At best, it produces temporary relief from the anxiety created by obsessive thoughts.

Other common rituals are a need to repeatedly check things, touch things (especially in a particular sequence), or count things. Some common obsessions include having frequent thoughts of violence and harming loved ones, persistently thinking about performing sexual acts the person dislikes, or having thoughts that are prohibited by religious beliefs. People with OCD may also be preoccupied with order and symmetry, have difficulty throwing things out (so they accumulate), or hoard unneeded items.

Healthy people also have rituals, such as checking to see if the stove is off several times before leaving the house. The difference is that people with OCD perform their rituals even though doing so interferes with daily life and they find the repetition distressing. Although most adults with OCD recognize that what they are doing is senseless, some adults and most children may not realize that their behavior is out of the ordinary.
.
Signs and Symptoms Ibiza

People with OCD generally:

* Have repeated thoughts or images about many different things, such as fear of germs, dirt, or intruders; acts of violence; hurting loved ones; sexual acts; conflicts with religious beliefs; or being overly tidy
* Do the same rituals over and over such as washing hands, locking and unlocking doors, counting, keeping unneeded items, or repeating the same steps again and again

* Can’t control the unwanted thoughts and behaviors

* Don’t get pleasure when performing the behaviors or rituals, but get brief relief from the anxiety the thoughts cause

* Spend at least 1 hour a day on the thoughts and rituals, which cause distress and get in the way of daily life.

Read More